“Step-Mother Ella?” I don't think so...
What is it with me? Why the hell do i constantly attract men with children?
Seriously, i am not one of those girls who can date a man knowing he has children from another woman. No, lemme rephrase that, i can do it, but i won't do it. I refuse too!
Here's the reason why; I am extremely selfish when it comes to my friends and my loved ones. And it just so happens that 'my man' falls under both categories; because he has to be a friend, and he also has to be a loved one. So being the selfish human being that i am, i do not like to share my man's attention with anyone! So here's the problem with dating a man who has children from another woman. A) there's another woman involved. B) I have to share his attention with his children from the woman before me. And C) My man and the woman before me, will always have a special bond because his FIRST child was with her.
Now, I may not be able to control a lot of things in my life, but i can control who i date, and who i fall in love with. (And for those of you people who think you can't control who you fall in love with. Yes you can. You have the power to control that. But i won't go into that, because that's a lot of explaining and writing to do, and honestly, I'm not in the mood to play ms. Teacher tonight. Matter fact, squash that, if you believe in love at first sight and if you believe that you cannot control who you fall for, then good for you. Believe what you'd like, i ain't here to change nobody's opinion or view of things.)
Here's why this topic came up.
I met this cool guy, right? Extremely good-looking, vegetarian, funny, understanding, all the above. But tonight, i find out he has a child, and attached to that child, is the child's baby mama. Now to be honest, immediately, it turned me of. He didn't do anything wrong, but just the mere fact that he has a child by someone else, that killed it for me. I was disappointed. And i didn't hide it well at all, because he picked up on the disappointment in my voice.
After we hung up, he texted me and asked me, “Are you scared?” But as i explained to him, its not a matter of being scared. I have nothing to be scared of, because i will not be putting myself in that situation. I don't like the idea of dating someone with baggage. I have enough baggage of my own to deal with, and last thing i want to do is add someone else baggage to my own. I must admit, i did really like him. But at the end of the day, i will not settle, and I've never been one to follow my heart. Why? Because I trust my common sense more then i do my emotions. I believe in common sense. I'll stop the early morning text messages, and late night phone-calls, and i will not hang out with him. I don't see the sense.
