I know. i know. i haven't blogged in forever. but so many things have been going on!
I actually been writing, just not posting. =/
but i will.

once i buy my new lap top!

be safe in 2011!

Love this bank dance!

How cute are they!

After i seen '500 days of Summer,' (which is now one of my favorite movies, if you can't already tell.)

I fell in love w/ Zooey Deschanel. (I was already MADLY in love w/ Joseph Gordon-Levitt so nothing new there.) But I didn't even know Zooey had a bang called, "She & Him."

& of course, I fell in love with her music also.

She's old fashoin, & her band sounds really old-fashion, so it's only natural i'd fancy her.

Her music just makes me happy...kinda like Regina Spektor music.

I don't think you could ever be sad when listening to Zooey and Regina sing....

Whenever someone tells me they got news to tell me...

I ask them if its bad or good news? and if its bad news, i tell them to give me a minute while i get my phone to play one of their songs...cuz no matter what the news..it won't sound as bad if im listening to their songs! Zooey Deschanel + Regina Spektor music is just...freaking...HAPPY music. that's why i love it. i STAY listening to their songs.

Don't even get me started on Regina's music...that's one person who's album I NEED to get cuz every song from her, i love! Especially, "Samsung," "Us," and "Hero!"


"I'm the hero of this story, don't need to be saved!"


-Regina Spektor.

Wanna hear my phone ring tone?



BAM!
If you call me, this is the song i'll hear....
 


Yes...ALL that is my ring-tone! LOL i loveeeeee how Joseph Gordon Leveitt sings this song while he's drunk. & since i couldn't find the normal version of him singing it, i settled for the movie version! which i don't mind, because i LIKE when my phone rings and people start to look around dazed + confused because they don't understand what kind of noise that is coming from my phone. Haha, the look on their face is price-less.

School is starting back next week, September 6th.

I can't wait...

I'm one of the few people in this world that actually ENJOYS learning...

Soon, I'll be looking like this...again.

i don't mind....

KNOWLEDGE IS POWER.

...in the end, it'll be worth it.

<--i love him..

Brad Pitt/Anthony Hopkins weekend.

My weekend was just dedicated to those two men.
Saturday, i watched 'Meet Joe Black,' starring Brad Pitt and Anthony Hopkins; and today, i watched 'Legends of the Fall,' also starring Brad Pitt and Anthony Hopkins. :)

*Sigh* have you ever seen a movie and you feel as if you know the character? If you haven't...watch the movie, 'Legends of the Fall' and i promise you by the end of the movie, you'll swear you know the character(s), especially Brad Pitt's character, 'Triston.'

i love this quote about Triston:

"...It was those who loved him most who died young. He was a rock they broke themselves against however much he tried to protect them..."

you'll understand that quote, once you see the movie...TOO much people loved him...meaning, everyone wanted a piece of him...& when he couldn't give himself to them...it was trouble.


What a man that Triston is....if i had the chance to bring could bring any movie-character to life, he'd be it!
Truth is, i was never up on brad the way people used to always be on him. I never really got the whole 'OMG BRAD PITT' appeal...UNTIL now! (i was more on George Clooney's old ass.) But then again, i'm watching OLD Brad Pitt movies, so maybe thats why im getting all his sex appeal now. But DAMN he lookin' good in these two movies. He looked good in 'Meet Joe Black,' but he look even better in 'Legends of the Fall!' My weakness has always been guys with long hair, but my God, that man named Brad Pitt can wear a pony tail...i have never seen long hair look so sexy on a man before!


'Legends of the Fall' was everything and more. My dad thought the movie was 'slow,' but it wasn't slow for me...at all. Unlike him, i don't just watch a movie to see ass-kicking. I watch it for the story. And 'Legends of the Fall' had a great story behind it! That why i say by the time you finish it, you'll feel as if you know the characters. Through-out the movie, you learn to love each character...even Brad Pitt's hard-ass, bad ass, sexy ass, character! ;]



The one part when Brad Pitt was running trying to save him baby brother from dying, i cried! (nothing new, right?) But that part was soooo sad! And then the part when he was sitting by the brothers grave and crying...sighs* it was so sad! Especially when he was crying so much, he put his hands over his eyes! Lol i was cryinnnnggg like crazy! I was there talking to the TV screaming, “Triston! don't cry! Don't cry Triston!”


(ask anyone, i'm the worst person to watch a movie with because i get sooooo into the movie! Nothing matters when my TV and DVD Is playing...)


but it was really good. I'm so glad Anthony Hopkins was in this movie. I adore that man. I really do. He's just so charming. I don't know if the way he speaks or how he looks, i don't know what it is. He's adorable. I wanna meet him just so i can hug him. I think its his accent. He's either Irish or Scottish. I love the scenes when he gets angry. I love to hear him yell because his accent comes out. If i ever meet him, i'll step on his shoe to pinch him while im hugging him, just so he can scream at me.

I reached that point in the year 2008.

While i was going through it; i saw it as punishment.

I couldn't understand why i was going through it.

But now...I look back and I realize...It was the biggest blessing.

Now, i understand why i had to go through it.....

...thank you God.

Negro please...you wish!


I don't believe in feeding people's ego. Call me mean, call me shady, but i just won't do it.

FACT: When you expect something from me? i won't deliver; but if you be humble and hope i'd do something, then i may do it. I don't live my life measuring up to people's expections....i couldn't care less if i live up to YOUR expections or not...]

Perfect example; Yesterday evening, i was sitting my living room watching a movie with my mom, when out of no-where the telephone rings. (Mind you, when the phone rings, i never answer it, because its never for me. I have a cell phone, and if any of my people need to get into contact with me, they know my number.) So the phone rings, and i don't even blink because A) I'm so into the movie I'm watching, because Christian Bale was in it (& i love me some Christian Bale!) and B) the phone is never for me.

So it was a surprise to hear my mother's mom say, “Daniella, come here, phone for you.” say what? Phone for me? I got up with an attitude to get the phone because truthfully, I was little irked. I didn't know who it was, but i knew one thing...whoever it was damn sure wasn't more important then my movie i was so into.

So when i said, "Hello?" some dude began talking.

And he was like “Hi daniella, good-day, this is _________. you remember me? I was just calling you....” this and that. And then I took a while to respond because by the time i realized WHO it was...i was PISSED!
I was upset at the fact that he interrupted my movie, I was pissed that he called my house phone without MY permission, because for you to even GET my house number, you had to pull up my personal file up, and go through my information to get my house number. And last but not least, i was pissed because HOW DARE HE think i would remember him after a year?
Crazy thing is, I DID remember him. I don't forget people or faces, no matter how big or small a part they may have played in my life. Its very rare that I'd forget a person, or their name.

You know why i got upset? I got upset because he was SO confident thinking that i would remember him. He's full of ego, and i don't work well with egocentric people. Take that shit somewhere else. When he kept asking me over and over again, if i remember him, i played dumb and kept saying, “no” (with a attitude attached.) Like i said, i knew damn well who he was, but i wasn't gonna blow smoke up that nigga's ass to make him feel good about himself. His ego needs to know that after a year, or more, you can't just call up someone out the blue, and EXPECT that person to remember you.
& honestly, even if i did let him know i remember him...then what? It ain't let we was gonna hang out or become best friends. Nigga, know your role, you a stranger.

Let me clear this up for those people who think i went about this the wrong way. Its not a problem to call someone and HOPE they remember you. But don't expect them too. You aren't anymore special then the next person. If you really believe you are, then you full of ego. There's a very thin line between ego and confident. If your ego is talking, you'll EXPECT that person to remember you, whereas, if your confident, you would say humbly, “ya know, i really hope you remember me, or i was hoping....” Not i thought you'd remember me....why would I? Tell me, What makes you so special?

*Background information: When i first moved to Trinidad, i met that guy at the police station where i went to register myself, and give my background information. He was the officer taking the information. And while he was taking the information, he was telling me about himself, because for some reason, when people met me, they just open up and over-load me with information about themselves. (Which i don't mind, but remove your ego before you speak to me.) I met him ONCE, over a YEAR ago....as i said, WHY would he assume i would remember him? He isn't any more special then the person i met yesterday, or the day before.

It sounds cold, and honest. But in my mind, everyone is on the same level. The homeless man on the street gets the same treatment that the boss at my job would get. Kinds words and a smile. Nothing more, nothing less. In my mind, you are no better then the next person.
Sounds harsh, but it isn't.

Why do i think that way?
Simple, like everything else in my life, trace it back to God.
We're all human, we're all fucked up in our own way. & in God's mind, no-one is better then anyone. We're all equal. Each of us have talents and gifts to bring to the table, we all have something unique and special about ourselves. So don't come at me with an attitude that says your more important then the next person. I know it isn't you talking, it's your ego. But i don't work well with ego's. Remove your ego, before you speak to me.
If homeboy had come at me with a humble attitude saying, "i hope you remember me.." rather then EXPECT me to remember him...then things could of went in his favor. To bad, at least next time he'll know better.
If he was smart, he'd do like me, and turn a embarrassing or bad situation around and see the positive in it. Next time around he'll know not to call someone's house after a year expecting them to know who he is, next time he'll know to respect the word, 'CONFIDENTIALITY.' And next time he'll know to just move on, and let the past be the past. Never try to bring the past back into your future. You'll just make a mess.

'Meet Joe Black.'......More like 'Fall in love with Joe Black.'



I forgot how good this movie was. Yesterday morning, in work, Shakira and I were looking up different kinds of movies of the interent, and she mentioned this one. Of course, we both had seen it. But i haven't seen it in so long. So today, as soon as i woke up, i threw some clothes on and went straight to the DVD store and brought the 'Meet Joe Black' DVD.
Fast forward couple of hours...

I just finished watching it and my shirt is soaked from crying.


To me, that's how i can tell if a movie is good. If a movie can move my emotions and bring me to tears, then in my book, that's a good movie! (Then again, I've just become so emotional these days. Its like any little thing makes me cry!) But whatever, that's always been my method on judging the quality of movies. And i don't just use that method on romantic or sad movies. Not at all! As i said, I cry for everything, so sad movie, happy movie, killer movie, romantic movie, drama movie; if you can make me cry, then shit, you getting a thumbs up!


But with this movie, 'Meet Joe Black,' its the ending of the movie that brings me to tears.


Actually, you know what i think made me cry the most? The fact that at the end of the movie, Joe Black, (a.k.a the Angel of Death) RETURNS the guy from the coffee shop. (Long story short, the Angel of Death needed a body, so he stole the body of a man who Susan meet and liked in the beginning of the movie.) I thought it was sweet to return the man to Susan, because he could of just left. But he gave Susan back the man she thought he always was, because he wanted her to be happy, even if it wasn't with him. Funny thing is, the entire time, she thought she was in love with the man she met at the coffee shop, but it wasn't him, it was the Angel of Death.


The man at the coffee shop, and the Angel of Death had VERY different personalities. The man at the coffee shop was super friendly, and sassy; whereas, the Angel of Death's personality was more clam, polite, and quiet. Another thing that made me cry was the fact that the Angel of Death didn't know how to act human-ish at times. Because he was new to being her father said his goodbyes, she then realizes who Joe Black really is, and why he acted so strangely. The saddest part is the fact that she didn't love the man from the coffee shop. She loved the Angel of Death. If you notice when the Angel of Death gives her back the man from the coffee shop, she looks disappointed...even sad. She didn't want him, she wanted the man who she fell in love, which unfortunately was the Angel of Death.


Another sad part was in the middle of the movie when the Angel of Death was talking to the old Jamaican lady in the hospital. She knew who he really was, and she was begging him to take her, because she was in pain, and the Angel of Death didn't want to take her because it wasn't her time. He didn't want to kill her. And afterwards, she realizes that he was getting to comfortable in human life form, and he told her how he was in love with a woman. So she began to warn him to stop and to go back from where he came from. And he didn't want to go back because he said its so lonely where he comes from. And he said something like, “For the first time, someone loves me, and someone wants me here....” and boy, when he said that! The tears started rolling down my face. I know its silly, but i just thought it was so sad, because its like...even angels get sad and lonely!


But i actually like movies like this. I like stories that talk to you about spiritual things. Like of God or Angels. Anything spiritual, i tend to like. Meet Joe Black, is def. one of my favorite movies, and Gabriel. Gabriel is another story similar to this one. It's about Angel Gabriel who comes down to Earth in human form. (Yeeaaaa, love that movie! After all, Angel Gabriel is my favorite angel to hear about.) ;]

but wow. what a good movie. Tomorrow, 'Legends of the Fall!' im excited to see that movie. the trailer looks hella good, so im hoping that movie meets my expections. its another movie starring both Brad Pitt and Anthony Hopkins! so it should be good! ;] woot* woot!*

[ the Orginal......now this is what I'm talking about...]

Will the REAL Bill Kaulitz please stand up....
Just look at the picture below, Bill(left) is FULL of confidence, and Adam, he just poses like a loser...because all he is, a cheap imitation, and copy-cat with a fat face.

I'm usually not mean, but Adam, GET YOUR OWN FUCKING STYLEEEEE!!!!!!

He is SUCH a retard. i'm sorry to be so blunt; but i SO dislike Adam whoever he is.

& to make it worst, he's SUCH a copy-cat. not only that, but people like him, who do and say DUMB shit for no reason just UPSET my nerves.

Because i'm such a good stalker when it comes to Bill and Tom, i reazlie this Adamm whoever is trying step in my twins shoes....so i realized, this dummy ripping of Bill's [odd] sense of style, but i thought it was JUST ME, so i didn't say anything. but then it became MORE + MORE clear that i was right.

yesterday, i was going through a magizine, and i saw dis fool's new hair cut, and guess what, it's cut the SAME way Bill has his hair cut......

ugh, because he [sometimes] is in magizine, i'm forced to actually see his ugly face, and i've noticed every passing week that goes by, he seems to go more and more "...Bill.-ish"

then i saw this video, and it all made sense.

the retarded admits to having a crush on Bill....

which is why he copys Bill!

ugh, i really don't like him. i'll explain why in a next blog, but for now, all i got left to say is,

<-the fake; the real -> 

GET YOUR OWN FUCKING STYLE ADAM whoever YOU ARE.
Bill is someone you'll never be, no matter HOW much make-up you put on.

“I was in the heat of passion and my hair extensions would come out - it was so embarrassing."

-Victoria Beckham (on being asked why she removed her hair extentions and cut her hair short.)

Your dance moves ain't nothing compared to his!

i like this guy.
I like this guy because he's one of the few guys i'd like to dance with mainly because he dances like me. There's music playing, but apparently, he's dancing to his OWN beat. When I dance, people tell me I be dancing to a different song in MY head, and I think he does too.


Crazy thing is; this guy, this character, is gonna build back Tom Cruise image.

Being funny, and making fun of yourself WILL ALWAYS win you cool points.


Always.

Hmm, interesting....very interesting.

You know the strangest thing I've seen?  I've seen atheist patients who claim to not believe in God, beg and say God's name over and over while having their breakdown.

Usually, atheist people do not speak of God, or say His name unless its to bash Him, or make fun of Him. But when all else fails, and they realize they have no-where to go, nothing to do, and no-one to save them, something inside cries out to God.
And the sad part is; as much as atheist people bash God, when they need help, or need to be saved, that same God they disclaim and make fun of doesn't pretend not to hear them. He doesn't ignore their cries.

Back in Florida, at 'New Horizon,' there was once a time when an [atheist] patient was being held down by the guards because he was behaving 'insane.” and because he was being held down, he couldn't help himself or free himself. Which made him behave more insane because he was being physically restricted. And because he was being physically restricted, his state of mind became even more insane. So being that he felt so helpless, physically and mentality, he screamed God's name and begged for help. After he did that, the guards loosened their hold on the man, because immediately he calmed down. Something inside of him, calmed down. The doctors, the nurses and even the other patients looked at each other confused, but I wasn't confused. His mind calmed down because he said four very small words, “Oh God, HELP me...” and once he said that, his mind instantly calmed down. Which eventually lead his body to calm down. And that is why the guards let him go.

There's power behind words....especially words surrounding God.

He was freed, because He asked for God's help. 

There's alot of people who claim to not believe in God, but sometimes thats a front. Sometimes, DEEP down, underneath all the denial and disappointment; there is STILL a small dime drop of hope, and faith. A lot ot the times, its there without them even knowing. 

As a person who strongly believes in God. I find it heart-breaking to come across an atheist person. Before, I used to get angry, because how dare them not acknowlege God. But now, I just pity them. I truly feel sorry for them, because their heart will never be at peace. I've met SO MANY people in my life who claim to not believe in God, and none of them have been happy. (I know that is 'generalizing' people, but that is from MY experience.) I guess that is why in the Bible, it says to pray for those who do not believe, because they'll never know God, and they'll never find out HIS personality. and thats the sad part, because once you UNDERSTAND His personality, you'll never look for external acceptance or approval from ANYONE else. 

 I do pray for those people who do not believe. Mainly because I know once a atheist returns to God, not only will THEY be happy, but I know God will be estastic knowing that another lost child has been found. 

Jerry: "...Why do you think God hasn't given up on us yet?..."

Ella:  *pause* "I think it's because He has SO much FAITH in man-kind. And I think because He's so strong, He knows WE are also so strong, (even though we may not know it) I also think He truly believes that there's still SOME good left in all of us...."

Jerry: "..You really think so?"

Ella: "I hope so...He made us, He knows what we're capable of...and what we're NOT capable of....maybe all hope isn't lost...I think if ALL hope was lost, He would intervene. I think He would step in and say, "enough IS enough!" But I don't think He's done that yet, because obviously, we're stronger then we THINK...if we couldn't handle it, then He would take control of the situation...but He hasn't yet...because He knows man-kind can endure this..." 

This pretty much explains itself.
When you desperately want something , GO for it.
don't be afraid, and don't let anything or anyone stop you.
There's a REASON you want it...

Whatever you desire MOST in this life...CAN be yours.

if only you believe...
"As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he."
so if you have a good heart, and believe that you are happy, rich, and successful, then it will done...

and if you doubt that...
God HIMSELF said these words:
"Son, thou art ever with me, and ALL THAT I HAVE IS THINE." 

I think people FORGET who they originally come from.
Your mother and your father are not your TRUE parents.
God is.
Your mother and father cannot DO the things God can...
So imagine; if YOU come from Him, Infinite Knowledge, Infinite Wisdom...tell me now...What is it that you think you CANNOT do?....

You can do everything and MORE...
Like father LIKE son...

think about that...

& its no secret; God says it OVER and OVER and OVER and OVER...
but we don't LISTEN. We don't take the time to READ BETWEEN THE LINES. 
Just listen to Him, He's telling you all the time, constantly trying to get you to OPEN UP what is locked away INSIDE you...

Learn your background...KNOW who you REALLY come from. We are ALL orphans living together...

When you LEARN & ACCEPT that...you'll NEVER doubt yourself again....Once you KNOW who your true Father is...you'll begin to BELIEVE..

...and believing is the first step in unlocking what is hidden inside you.

HELP!!! I can't stop....=x
i think i like the stupid corny boy! LMFAO! ^_^

She killed it!

i love this video! it's hott!
Shakira looks beautiful in it! beautiful and happy!
i love her dance, she's just adorable, and cute as hell.
She could sit down and scratch her knee and i'd still say "awww! how adorable!" she's just THAT cute. she can get away with anything.

So, my question is, who's this HOTT guy in the start of the video? someone please tell me, because he's hot like fiyahhhh! lol if he plays soccer, i wanna know what team hes on so i can cheer for his sexy ass!

how cute were these guys @ 2:07? especially when they did their 'Waka Waka' dance?

and hmmm............this motherrrrr freaker here....looking all sexy when he winked at the camera! (damn it kills me to say that! Grrr!)

I'm ashamed to say this....

It's official, i must be loosing my damn mind.
I never thought in a million and two years that i would EVER find this fool attractive. I mean, of ALL people....and the thing is, I don't even find him attractive, it's just...something so very...UGLY, but cute about him...wtf...i can't put my finger on it...(Ugh, damn this World Cup, its bringing out all kinds of crazy emotions!)

i think it was when i saw these pictures of him and his ex-girlfriend, my first thought was, "Awwh! whos' that? they're a cute couple!" That was, until i looked CLOSER and realized WHO he was...i don't have anything agaisnt him, i just don't like the whole Jersey Shore look. you know the whole 'orange tan, pretty boy, no hair, gel and hairspray' look...its TOO clean, and too pretty. (I don't want no man looking prettier then me! What the hell....LMAO!) There's a different between "handsome" and "pretty"...handsome is for a man, and pretty should be for a woman.

I'm divided, because i don't care for him; but i kinda like him...but i kinda don't.

 

End note: pay no attention to this blog. Pretend you never saw it.

I get them too...


I don't like to be negative, but fuck it. We all have our days. and today was mines.
Plain talk, and bad manners; Today was SHIT.
The one good thing that stood out about today was the fact that I FINALLY found a local book store that is selling my Oscar Wilde Book.


[ Anyone who knows me, knows I'm alittle, just a tiny bit obsessed with Oscar Wilde's book, "The Picture of Dorian Gray." and i been dying to get my hands on a copy! & finally, the day has come! ]

On some real shit, I can't even BEGIN to tell me the HELL I have put myself THROUGH just to read that fucking book. Honestly, I think that's why my eyes are hurting now.


What happened was...I couldn't find the book anywhere, (well, i don't wanna say i couldn't find the book, truth is, i didn't look for the book!) I just assumed that the particular book I was looking for, wasn't going to be sold in stores here.

But before you bash me, just know...lesson learned! I learned my lesson! Never assume anything ever again! GOT IT. 

Anyways, here's what REALLY happened...After I saw the movie, 'Dorian Gray' (..starring that precious, dreamy, sweet like sugar, candy man Ben Barnes) that's when I found out about Dorian Gray. And after I found out about Dorian Gray, I found out about Oscar Wilde, (the man and author behind the 'legendary' Dorian Gray.) So being the nosey person I am, I researched  who Oscar Wilde was, and became fasinated by him. Long story short, I became so desperate to read Oscar Wilde's book that I went online and downloaded the book to my lap-top, and been reading it from there since.

Now here's the problem I ran into; For those of you who don't know; when you stare at a computer screen for hours on end, your eyes DO begin to hurt.


I can speak from experience, don't do it! (Always give your eyes a break!)
or else you'll end up a mess, like me....maybe not like me...but....I don't know whats wrong with me. It's like, when i find a good book, I become temporary insane. Madness just takes over. In my mind, it's like, if i don't READ that book a.s.a.p, I'll collaspe and die...what the hell...its like 'well...ya know, if i don't read the book now, tomorrow, i may get hit by a car, and then i'll never know what happened!' i think that's how my brain operates...I would be the dummy to die, and then when it comes time to meet God, I'll be the fool to be like, "Wait, I left something on Earth, Can I pleaseee run back and get my book so I can read it in Heaven!? Gimme two minutes! just two minutes!" I just get SO excited for books! it's unnatural!

 Ya know, I blame Oscar Wilde, if his book wasn't so damn interesting, I would never get stuck on it...and my eyes won't be hurting now. Lemme stop, I don't pour blame out on anyone. It was MY choice to sit behind this SAME screen and read. But for all of you who don't know, that book is SO good, and it has such wonderful QUOTES in it...I'm a quote gal, so his book was like Heaven for me! I've NEVER in ALL my 23 years of life, EVER read a book, with SO many amazing quotes...no lie, EVERY page has 2-3 quotes I pull and save. That's how good his writing is...it's beautiful! 


I don't know how it is for other people, but books make me really happy. and when i find a GOOD book, i just escape in it. i fall into a NEW world, and sometimes...i can't get out. (well, i can, but i don't want to.) i get lost in books, and its hard for me to put a good book down. Many people say that's why i write so much. they say its because writing allows you to be anyone, anywhere, anytime, and at any place. I always want to get away. I never want to stay where I am. I'm always dreaming....morning, noon, and night. And as a writer, it's a known fact, your dreams CAN become a reality...once that pen hits the paper...


So yeah, so that's the story about my book.

I'm hype. and I can't WAIT to get my hands on the actual book copy. I'm going to cherish it, and love it.

&& for ya'll who don't share my excitment about my new book...BITE ME.

Tom hair looking a hott mess!

its cute when they pat each others head. :)